becoming your martyr

lots of people do this.
decide that life is too painful, sad, unfair, etc. and all they want is to feel needed.
they want this but dont seek it out, skimming surfaces when they should be diving deeper. yes i feel for them but there is a point when you just say to yourself "they need to find their way, alone." the oft tendency then, is becoming your martyr. making yourself out to be some hero of old who struggles only to find some strand of purpose. they do this and succeed only to view themselves this way. others see them as being self serving, even liars.

advice: screw this all! i am going to live and love and be my martyr no more. i am going to enjoy life and it will have me as its patron not its begger.

good day.
adam