tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-86594222012-01-28T08:30:41.541-08:00Language (really) is Hindranceadm dmsnoreply@blogger.comBlogger761100tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8659422.post-1174883394929235852007-03-25T22:28:00.000-07:002007-03-25T22:29:54.940-07:00

blah test blah

adm dmsnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8659422.post-1146332174537436692006-04-29T10:07:00.000-07:002006-04-29T10:36:14.576-07:00

Tonight is the Global Night Commute. At this moment there are 54,894 around the US and World people signed up to spend the night in their city center. One part of me thinks that is a small number then i realize that its not a march through the streets for an hour on a saturday; all who signed up will be sleeping in parks, churches, gymnasiums, etc. That number demands a bit more emphasis sooooo I

adm dmsnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8659422.post-1145594365470731562006-04-20T21:32:00.000-07:002006-04-20T21:39:30.783-07:00

hello is not a beginning.so i've applied for FAFSA and the ball is rolling. I dont know that the big white hats are appealing but the idea of an open door all over the world sure is. i suppose the door could be equated to the mouth and my life is dependant on the stomach...hopefully. i wait for the fafsa folks to send back a figure all the while registering at rtc.tomorrow is banquet with the

adm dmsnoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8659422.post-1143673604169082852006-03-29T14:54:00.000-08:002006-03-29T15:07:33.056-08:00

it nearly got away, again.i have been riding a stationary bike. it goes very fast but not quite as far. i rode 10 stationary miles yesterday. Today i will match that distance with a longitudinal (yes its a word) expertise, sending my spirit and my heart rate through the roof. I have been working out with andre almost 3 times a week for a few months now. results in muscle mass and endurance have

adm dmsnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8659422.post-1143072832125386412006-03-22T16:04:00.000-08:002006-03-22T16:13:52.136-08:00

Howdy,i havent posted or really written in a few months.i pretended like i had no time for things requiring a dash of thought. HA i read all the harry potter books since i last posted. no, not impressive, pathetic. wow i love that series. the sixth is calling me back for seconds soon! i have started about 5 books and finished them within a few short minutes. finished to me that is. its not that

adm dmsnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8659422.post-1138434930425187652006-01-27T23:54:00.000-08:002006-01-27T23:56:26.873-08:00

A Smile That Explodes

adm dmsnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8659422.post-1131090003077758862005-11-03T23:22:00.000-08:002005-11-04T19:47:34.213-08:00

how pitiful am i!i dont know what to do with myself sometimes-often. starting over is hard, especially when you know and He knows that it should have been done ages ago.i dont know what i feel right now, or if i feel i suppose. i dont think i do at this hour. i want something that seems so distant and...... its distance has not once lessened my desire for it. not like most distances do to most

adm dmsnoreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8659422.post-1131088758772577102005-11-03T23:18:00.000-08:002005-11-03T23:19:18.783-08:00

i guess i should update sometime soon.

adm dmsnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8659422.post-1127199819151570102005-09-19T23:16:00.000-07:002005-10-03T17:18:01.170-07:00

The past week or so I've thought about the way I've written in the past and I am highly critical of it. Some of it may be good but I feel like there was not much thought to it. i write about something without wanting to. Get somewhere without choosing that somewhere.Kept in little jars on little shelves,PAINT!sold to begging farmers who'er saving souls.MY!Temporal pain can be released with a days

adm dmsnoreply@blogger.com10tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8659422.post-1126169214124206802005-09-08T01:27:00.000-07:002005-09-08T01:46:54.130-07:00

why is it so hard to follow you?for me to disregard the pleasures and leisures of today and be a child of forever should be simple. it should be easy. only you can make every new day seems so new.

adm dmsnoreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8659422.post-1125688167859072492005-09-02T12:01:00.000-07:002005-09-02T12:09:27.866-07:00

lots of people do this. decide that life is too painful, sad, unfair, etc. and all they want is to feel needed.they want this but dont seek it out, skimming surfaces when they should be diving deeper. yes i feel for them but there is a point when you just say to yourself "they need to find their way, alone." the oft tendency then, is becoming your martyr. making yourself out to be some hero of

adm dmsnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8659422.post-1125467509623000102005-08-30T22:51:00.000-07:002005-08-30T23:26:23.166-07:00

i love the new blindside cd...there is a lot of...how you say? blood in it...and fearthe song FELL IN LOVE WITH THE GAMEYou take me by the hand and I grab You by the throatAnd we come crashing down through the windowOn the dirt ground belowAnd we wrestle in the mud and the blood and the beerBreak my jaw I don’t careJust stay with me, stayLock my arms I don’t want to moveHold me still teach me how

adm dmsnoreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8659422.post-1125049586038087012005-08-26T02:30:00.000-07:002005-08-30T22:51:16.650-07:00

wow.thank you for grace Lord and that your promises are true and that you are my GOD and there are so many "and's" i cant begin or end to explain You, how big you are and how you work in so many small situations and...thank you.*written at worque*I think i am bound. that there is a life contract set by situation and involvement. a bounty for our words.i tell and have told my self that i want to

adm dmsnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8659422.post-1124006612223388692005-08-14T00:57:00.000-07:002005-08-14T01:03:32.230-07:00

to be filled with awe and wonder.i was listening to the bible answer man on the way home, he had a special guest. i dont remember this fellows name but i liked him. he explained things well and held many of the same opinions and stood many of the same stances i take on the christian life and walk. i liked him for that reason i guess. he was honest and candid and you dont get that much. its a pity

adm dmsnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8659422.post-1123832518286712042005-08-11T23:52:00.000-07:002005-08-12T00:42:07.740-07:00

"lord undo me"-how then are we undone? such a desire is felt at least once in the life of Christian. After the death of a love one, knowing nothing will return them to you; After being disappointed by someone you thought could never fail. These instances of being undone are brought through circumstancesand are not based solely on the reflection of who we are at our worst. When _______ asks to be

adm dmsnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8659422.post-1123576598554753552005-08-09T01:09:00.000-07:002005-08-09T01:36:38.600-07:00

Another few weeks have passed since I last used you/this/it.another few weeks since I posted my thoughts.this time I'm really going to try and be better about posting, being consistent in something. I have been very inconsistent in my life all around these days so this being no exception should not surprise me/you/it.moving pieces on a rubix-cubenone stay put, I'll never get through.when I find

adm dmsnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8659422.post-1122017596714026682005-07-22T00:12:00.000-07:002005-07-22T11:00:57.713-07:00

evenin'when i first started this blog it was for me. i liked it a lot. i posted every feeling, frustration, joy and fancy. sadly that changed. i started thinking more about the readers than about me.Readers Digest. what a great name.if i had a little magazine i would call it that.today was good. i had a lot of fun with a abi (most of the time spent defending my armpits). work was grand. blindside

adm dmsnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8659422.post-1121119381777213462005-07-11T14:56:00.000-07:002005-07-11T15:05:57.596-07:00

to write or not to write...to not write, is painful. everything i want to express is bottled up and wants out!welcome back self.i dont know where to begin and dont know where to stop, i dont want to stop.this movement from my mind to finger from pen to paper is beautiful and i am disappointed by my lack of motivation. i havent been gone but i havent been HERE. its not that i havent had time for

adm dmsnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8659422.post-1118389999238629282005-06-10T00:30:00.000-07:002005-06-10T00:55:55.936-07:00

Art needn't concern itself with explanations. No excuse or goodly feeling should ever be offered in compromise of its expressive power.That is what it is right, expression? Expression of my heart and her soul and the overflow of his entire being. It is "us" and we offer that part-of-"us" birth. We give it (if we have guts enough...To all who have eyes or ears or tongue or nose or nerves, those

adm dmsnoreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8659422.post-1118161916517869542005-06-07T09:31:00.000-07:002005-06-07T09:39:20.960-07:00

last night went to work and got a big blister on my left pinky toe, the shoes i wore were too small. I closed at work and it took far too long, mary is a slow one. getting home i talked to donovan for a while and it was cool. its good get others opinions on matters of the "next." tonight he and i are hangin out as we have not done this in many moons, or tides, or days. then i had a wonderful

adm dmsnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8659422.post-1116889923010001332005-05-23T16:11:00.000-07:002005-05-23T16:28:41.043-07:00

The believers stand behind him and smileAs the day lights up with fire. -dmbLord, make me an instrument of thy peace,where there is hatred, let me sow love;Where there is injury, pardon;Where there is doubt, faith;Where there is despair, hope;Where there is darkness, light;Where there is sadness, joy.O Divine Maseter, grant that i may not so much seek to be consoled as to console,to be

adm dmsnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8659422.post-1116402431320402182005-05-18T00:16:00.000-07:002005-05-18T00:49:10.110-07:00

if you're true... if you describe about whats going on in your life or in the room or what you pick up. cos a lot of our songs i feel like they're overheard conversations. sometimes they're not my stories but i feel them very deeply...but to be true is really important...and i think that gods interested in truth and only interested in truth. and that is why god is interested in rock and roll

adm dmsnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8659422.post-1115458220822370652005-05-07T02:05:00.000-07:002005-05-07T02:36:48.733-07:00

Skim the surface, the fat of the cream.walk along the shoreline with your silent song.follow, lead, as you follow, not too far behind. Together is better off apart.what is desired I would give it. What desire? would you have it?even if you win, even then you don't win.excellence does not appear spontaneously, rather it is the antithesis.YOU SPOKE TO ME FORM A DISTANCE IVE NEVER KNOWN.I TOLD YOU

adm dmsnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8659422.post-1114847948888352722005-04-30T00:58:00.000-07:002005-04-30T01:19:18.753-07:00

Soon, there will come a time when you will no longer see me. I’ll be gone, off to some place of obscurity (or is it purpose?). When you call to me I will not answer. This place of purpose (or is it obscurity?) will change me and I will love it and it will deny me…at first. I don’t know where it and I will be found or lost better yet-embraced. ----------!TIME!----------GRACE, I lack it often.

adm dmsnoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8659422.post-1114797910409601802005-04-29T10:43:00.000-07:002005-04-29T11:47:25.883-07:00

she is beautiful and bound.wondeful and wrapped, in metal and plastic.rest now in sleeps pretense. "the angels wings will cover you tonight, halleluja, halleluja.rest your head against the breast of christ, halleluja, halleluja." "thoughts pass by like a river flows."this little girl is very pretty, her parents must often wonder what she might have been like, without the pain. they must

adm dmsnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8659422.post-1113844462196373122005-04-18T10:15:00.000-07:002005-04-18T10:48:54.963-07:00

Went to a mormon "church" yesterday. Abi, James, Melissa and i traveled to redmond to the stake found only a stones toss from my old school. Excerpts and addings to what was said this passed sunday.And everything was prompted, paper fed, papers read.No heart, no person in those words. stale. nothing unique, beauty stifled."faith is to hope for things unseen, that you know are true." in the name

adm dmsnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8659422.post-1113557406794110872005-04-15T02:28:00.000-07:002005-04-15T02:30:06.796-07:00

Yahweh, U2Take these shoesClick clacking down some dead end streetTake these shoesAnd make them fitTake this shirtPolyester white trash made in nowhereTake this shirtAnd make it clean, cleanTake this soulStranded in some skin and bonesTake this soulAnd make it singYahweh, YahwehAlways pain before a child is bornYahweh, YahwehStill I’m waiting for the dawnTake these handsTeach them what to

adm dmsnoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8659422.post-1113110333795311962005-04-09T21:56:00.000-07:002005-04-09T22:18:53.796-07:00

...this day was beautiful.God i long to be with You and while that longing remains, i desire a full life. Nothing medial, nothing ordiniary, i people to speak in envy of how you used me. And i want that envy to grow into desire and that desire to be rooted in You. That my life would inspire usefulness and worth and that because of your workings righteousness would spring.This is a beautiful day.

adm dmsnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8659422.post-1112859004396748452005-04-06T23:57:00.000-07:002005-04-07T00:40:57.896-07:00

...or if you'd rather be a window id gladly be your frame...here are some poems i wrote last year during Creative Writing...A Place Called SorrowThere is a man who lives in that apartment.He's been there a while now. Every day he leaves just to get back in.He walks quickly just to feel insecure, to realize how much he misses being home.He walks as briskly as an older man can, Through

adm dmsnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8659422.post-1111916909150342982005-03-27T01:08:00.000-08:002005-03-27T01:51:11.186-08:00

i dont know what is going through my mind, through my finger tips, my feet, my heart. this is an exciting time to be alive, (i tried to finish that sentence better but being vague seems to fit best). after work i took the spoils of the week to our place. i felt so grown up. ive relied on others so much. different families, friends, all giving, pouring out their riches. im pathetic in my response.

adm dmsnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8659422.post-1111655901597229442005-03-24T01:08:00.000-08:002005-03-24T01:25:12.153-08:00

tonight was great.awana.hanging out with andre', sean o., donovan.we had a good conversation about prayer. is gods hand in every pool? my conclusion is NO. he lets us live and lets glasses break and gardens grow. he lets them be and break and flourish, when i say "lets" i mean leaves them to their course.anyway the following stuff is all random journal stuff, some prayer some just conversations

adm dmsnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8659422.post-1111133082536863342005-03-17T23:52:00.000-08:002005-03-18T00:07:17.613-08:00

hello,this day i dyed my hair. slightly lighter, slightly not as blonde as i had hoped, slightly kinda sad. i worked tonight, it was long but enjoyable. during my break i wrote something, inspired by what seems to be christian dogma. how to treat eachother! those who dont seem perfect, who dont line up with CCM culture are treated as lepers. a wounded leg doesnt need to be hidden it needs to be

adm dmsnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8659422.post-1111045536347140522005-03-16T23:17:00.000-08:002005-03-16T23:49:07.840-08:00

about the worlds insanity and how we've gotten lost.today was grand. aside from adventures in gas-fumed bread it was simply marvelo'last night i spent 3 hrs drawing, i did a pencil copy of Jacques-Louis David's Death of Marat. i guess it turned out okay, there is a lot with it i am not pleased with. facial expression, slightly misshapen arm, a loose copy i suppose. well those 3 hrs ended around 3

adm dmsnoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8659422.post-1110875443407975782005-03-14T23:56:00.000-08:002005-03-15T00:30:43.410-08:00

who am i to be thought of?i feel so lonely sometimes, dont we all? Caught up in these soil-bound vessels. trapped in misconception. "Life is pain!" wesley exclaims to his love. Or was it the pirate to the slut?it's many things, joy, sorrow, filled with purpose, emtpied of sanity.life is such that pain must dictate, the evaluation not the instance.i suppose joy too is a cause of change though half

adm dmsnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8659422.post-1110275347097357052005-03-08T01:29:00.000-08:002005-03-08T01:56:52.130-08:00

it is one-thirty in the morning. this day that passed took with it opportunity. for about a week now i have neglected my love. not only have i shunned his words but i have forsaken our conversations. sure, ive prayed, off hand remarks about how i desire this and that. all for ruin i say. i was coaxed into doing this i suppose. many nights i have battled myself. do i go ahead and do my quiet time,

adm dmsnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8659422.post-1109664930772378822005-03-01T00:15:00.000-08:002005-03-01T23:06:34.256-08:00

Woohooo, so work was very productive. Both my mind and hands worked with such fervor.Driving to work I had this odd feeling, sensation rather...the creative part of my mind literally said to me, through an echo in my head "i-i-i'm ba-ack"Such feeble thought, I think,I thought. This day will drift away. When sounds I sound will reach the dead,resounding in this day.The famine feast,the trumpets

adm dmsnoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8659422.post-1108754919652554082005-02-22T12:05:00.000-08:002005-02-22T12:07:01.460-08:00

I don’t know what or how to write. This amazing drought has gone far too long. I’ve begged the skies for rain to fall. Every plea, every attempt at writing has failed. Not lack of skill but thought, each and every brain wave has failed me. To continue pacing through fields of dirt is futile. I must plant seeds in preparation of rain, having faith it will come. Indeed it must.This world in which

adm dmsnoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8659422.post-1108025658516007832005-02-10T01:21:00.000-08:002005-02-10T00:55:05.586-08:00

this hour i write to write. its been many days since i last tried. being a bit scared of what may come out, not content but literary soundness. ive felt so very inadequate in the writing arena lately. not comparing myself to others but by an inner voice that persuaded me for this time to cease all work. i hope to return with vengence. im listening to pedro the lion right now praying for a friend.

adm dmsnoreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8659422.post-1107420244949515742005-02-03T01:24:00.000-08:002005-02-03T00:46:09.690-08:00

my mind is dull. i cant write because my emotions arent "out of balance"-maybe not out of balance but there is nothing that prescribes that i tell of. i want even these moments of absolute contentment to be overridden with uncontainable joy. grant me this, oh lord that dictates change. people in big black shoes they do not dance, men in tight neckties they will not dance. the movie charriots

adm dmsnoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8659422.post-1106730264610485302005-01-26T01:47:00.000-08:002005-01-26T01:04:24.610-08:00

today was most cool. i was lazy in the beginning. having watched i-Robot then gladiator took it out of me. in the course of the day i started cleaning our room, made a ninja action figure look way cooler than the manufacturer had intended(with the help of a sharpie) then went for a run. oi the run was hard but worth it in the loong run-ba doom cha-went to bible study tonight. it was a really good

adm dmsnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8659422.post-1106643421851797252005-01-25T01:36:00.000-08:002005-01-25T00:59:53.230-08:00

i havent written in a while it seems. not empty just uninspired. today was heading south, boring with a few speedbumps. 4:30 comes and the days becomes wonderfully wonderfull. restoration is sweet, honey is no match for its sweetness. God (three small, empty letters cant embody your love, life, judgement, righteousness, glory, beauty, provision and care for my torrid soul) of all that is, you

adm dmsnoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8659422.post-1106301414873457602005-01-21T01:33:00.000-08:002005-01-21T01:56:54.873-08:00

an irresistable itch, i want to write something that inspires but all i have is this drabble. its late and i should be sleeping but i dont do much of that lately. im listening to damien rice~O. such an amazing cd. i love his voice, songwriting, sense of innoncene and honesty. on the cd there is a woman bkg vocalist, i love her voice to as high a degree as i love the cd, a lot. i watched The

adm dmsnoreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8659422.post-1106036556697562752005-01-18T00:45:00.000-08:002005-01-18T00:45:06.186-08:00

my goodness, the adventure life demands and the way we fail it. i will not fail it. i still expect nothing but... ive spent so much time trying to neglect every notion that sucha familiar sound now escapes me just as OJ fled the police...but they caught him didnt they? why do i feel like ive done something wrong? if anything ive avoided and trulu defeated sin a number of times recently. this

adm dmsnoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8659422.post-1105606659350694542005-01-13T01:39:00.000-08:002005-01-13T00:57:39.350-08:00

i go through seasons of thought. there are far more than four, hundreds every year. each ushered in by things around me, work, friends... these things require an emotional response and in that response a season is held. as that season fades so does the initial, familiar feeling that made that part of my life so unique. this is pointless rambling. its almost like she died. no prolonged goodbyes

adm dmsnoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8659422.post-1105268198774767182005-01-09T02:58:00.000-08:002005-01-09T02:57:26.230-08:00

just gettin off work i can never rationalize with the facts. i have to be awake in 4 and a half hours. i am never refreshed after i sleep, its wierd i always feel i can sleep more and more and more...i have to force myself to wake so i dont wast hours i think i may use wisely. on the drive home i was thinkin about stuff i want to write about. i came to the tireing conclusion that i have so many

adm dmsnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8659422.post-1104969052910634952005-01-05T15:47:00.000-08:002005-01-05T15:51:18.140-08:00

i was singin hymns in the shower and decided i'd write one myself... If I could lift my voice to sing of thy righteousness My song would be upon thy Son, sung from angel’s lips Until this day that honors due, my heart shall bend to thee Forgiven slave and purged from sin still I bend my knee. Fainter still will my heart grow before I set on Love Withering in shadows cast, bring light from high

adm dmsnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8659422.post-1104919886849026382005-01-05T01:57:00.000-08:002005-01-05T02:12:29.153-08:00

people do it, they go to school they have friends close and far. they go to movies and get ice cream afterward. they call their mom and dad every few weeks asking for a little help with the bills because they had a monetary collapse. they'll soon graduate with honor owing a brick building thousands of follars. sooner than later they will have found "the one" and will be wed during the first half

adm dmsnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8659422.post-1104100713440331482004-12-26T14:35:00.000-08:002004-12-26T14:38:33.440-08:00

Ive been posting a lot the past few days...read em because they were born out of some excitement which made me post them in such a blob. I wrote this last night, christmas...well it was the 26th but late last night... I’m beginning to remember what life was like before the fall, the tumble crumble of that hideous wall. Built around us as false protection, built as safety from seeing eyes

adm dmsnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8659422.post-1104052134951417812004-12-26T01:56:00.000-08:002004-12-26T01:12:23.300-08:00

eyes: blue hair: blonde heigth: 13inches weight: unknown DOB: unknown name: Douglas E. Donaldson Donaldson was assigned to me thursday, decenber 23rd. He has no past to tell of, his existence is disputed. My protection and my friend, Douglas would sacrifice his life for any one of my friends and of course for me. This is a picture taken while standing guard over the kitchen. here is another,

adm dmsnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8659422.post-1103968792939555712004-12-25T01:22:00.000-08:002004-12-25T01:59:52.940-08:00

now witness this, an unfolding. an epitaph reading "Hither lies the old man, having given birth to hate, greed and elusive behavior." Never did he waver, until his host declared him a toast. "Goodbye and Goodnight." Sprouting from cold stone is new meaning, resurrected from a new borns smile. Things can change, "they must" says this child with a rattle of the jaw. SORRY- a pointless reply to

adm dmsnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8659422.post-1103793339698445622004-12-23T01:45:00.000-08:002004-12-23T01:15:39.696-08:00

i feel as though i havent posted in weeks. i havent written for a while. until just recently, i wrote a letter to someone, it fulfilled that hour oath i have not kept lately. Now i wait and hope for the best, well anything but silence is the best in this case. it was a freeing hour, expulsion of thoughts that had been caged for weeks now. maybe it seemed as though i hadnt written for weeks

adm dmsnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8659422.post-1103363668763031202004-12-18T01:51:00.000-08:002004-12-18T01:54:28.763-08:00

At work, yes again I came up with an idea at work. I have an extended amount of time to think, while doing dishes, making mochas or sweeping the café I open my mind to the awkward flow that is Adam. I decided that I will be writing an hour a day. Give or take a bit of time but I am committing to writing for close to if not more than 60 minutes a day. If this is something I desire to

adm dmsnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8659422.post-1103273953729792072004-12-16T23:27:00.000-08:002004-12-17T00:59:13.730-08:00

its funny the way we train ourselves to do things a certain way. for instance i am sitting in my bedroom with the lights off on my bed/couch. i do this every night because donovan, my best friend also sleeps in this room, he goes to school early and so desires a good and early nights sleep. i bring this up because he is not here but i still feel that i cant write like i would usually if the

adm dmsnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8659422.post-1103186406279698922004-12-16T01:17:00.000-08:002004-12-16T00:40:56.983-08:00

i dont want to give up, i dont wanna lose. if driving those tired hours one more time would change something, i would do it in a heart beat. i dont want to give you up, i dont want to lose you. if driving those anxious hours one more time would make a difference, i would drive them now. i dont mind being hopefull, even if i've lost you. so unimaginably frustrated am i. alienation of your

adm dmsnoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8659422.post-1103015992779908122004-12-13T23:58:00.000-08:002004-12-14T01:19:52.780-08:00

i dunno how to start this. i worked a lot today and during that 8hr span i thought and wrote a lot. every time i had an cool thought or grand ol idea(r) id throw some ink on a scratch piece o paper which was wadded and rewadded over and over and over again into my back pocket. POEM-i'm no simpleton although im rather plain and if a horn would blow id leave this simple place when that sharpness

adm dmsnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8659422.post-1102840754395455442004-12-12T01:00:00.000-08:002004-12-12T00:42:13.626-08:00

its hard to focus when there is such commotion, the c0nsistent bother proves to slow my mind. im here watching harry potter 3. good movie but its hard to convey my thoughts correctly with discussion of broom and witch in the air. friday i drove up to Mtn Springs Lodge where the RIM (fmr hs group) goes every year for a retreat. i dont know why i went aside from small amounts of pressure from joey

adm dmsnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8659422.post-1102496476273560642004-12-08T01:08:00.000-08:002004-12-08T01:10:52.736-08:00

its late and i have FINALLY discovered how to post pictures. it has taken me more than an hour to find a good place to host them and the glorious ease by which PHOTOBUCKET allows one to do so makes me oh so happy oh so gay. im listenin to crash rickshaw. this picture is of me swingin from a tree that was in our backyard in south africa. i am superman, no joke. the house that holds the yard that

adm dmsnoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8659422.post-1102467690102572262004-12-07T16:13:00.000-08:002004-12-07T17:01:30.103-08:00

with emotions like a vapor, our kindred hearts find little time. passive seekers seek for voices to penetrate the sky. walking streets of stone, does little to divide, yourself from caves and darkness, the places where you hide. scathing lips and deafened ears the price for own accord active lies and hollow thought disdained by holy sword hemled and clad by mortal sin, the weapon none can wield.

adm dmsnoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8659422.post-1102413729569998312004-12-07T01:55:00.000-08:002004-12-07T02:02:09.570-08:00

i miss the times that wont be spent, likc spare change for a train headed east i miss the clouds left unborn, like a deviant child for its fathers home. i miss them still i miss them.

adm dmsnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8659422.post-1102240261055739892004-12-05T01:09:00.001-08:002004-12-05T15:36:01.420-08:00

(revised) when you see a bright light shining as bright as a bright light would shine, the brightness of that particular light may be incredibly dim. It may even be dim enough to be classified as "out" although it assuredly and confidently sends forth the most miniscule rays and is capable of casting the softest shadows. this is the case in darkness, when you know a dying ember to be brilliant

adm dmsnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8659422.post-1101761689890251552004-11-29T11:59:00.000-08:002004-11-29T12:54:49.890-08:00

aggravation. aggravation.. aggravation. (synonym of pain, i wont call it pain cos it deserves a lesser word. not that it hurts less but i dont think i want to give it that much satisfaction.) Yesterday had potential to be the best day of my life, instead the whirlwind of perfect experiences was tainted with ignorance, jealousy and sad cliche's for later writing. every few yards of beauty was

adm dmsnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8659422.post-1101202256136483112004-11-23T00:22:00.000-08:002004-11-23T01:30:56.136-08:00

frustration. frustration.. frustration. God why?...im gonna stop there. i always ask God why. i never let him just tell me his ways/reasons or discretions, i just assume that i have to ask and that he wont answer me. soon i will forget this human pain and the cycle will flow as it has many years over. the impurity that fell will be lost in the clouds before it hits the ground. i was gonna turn

adm dmsnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8659422.post-1100804986461526022004-11-18T11:01:00.000-08:002004-11-18T11:09:46.463-08:00

Little-town syndrome, I feel like I’m dying slowly as if there’s a looming darkness. That darkness has black gloves and a plastic bag that he’s more than willing to share. Its nothing immediate, he stands behind me letting me feel his breath on my neck. Of course I don’t turn, I’m too busy living life and making myself appreciated. It was an epiphany at daylight, waking in this town of

adm dmsnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8659422.post-1100682736161883192004-11-17T01:28:00.000-08:002004-11-17T01:38:44.960-08:00

Listenin to Dave Matthews Seek Up (live with Tim Reynolds) Sins and Swears We have no need for nets, safety or security, those exist in theory not in life. If God is love and love is real then where can I find Him? In the fading arms of a one night stand, or in the softest touch of a mother’s hand. This honest question is ripe with lies. My well-earned reputations, of being "steadfast" and "

adm dmsnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8659422.post-1100030553717670482004-11-09T11:27:00.000-08:002004-11-09T12:12:14.676-08:00

The strangest thing happened recently. I assure you embellishment is not the means by which I write. This is factual and convincingly weird. My classmates and I were given sections of a textbook to read aloud during class. When it came upon me to read the whole class jumped out of their desks and ran to the door. Some leaving the class all together while others just looked through the doorways

adm dmsnoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8659422.post-1099970193847932042004-11-08T19:15:00.000-08:002004-11-08T19:16:33.846-08:00

the past week has been amazing. God has been faithfull in so many areas, both hidden and visible. The biggest thing i need right now is structure. i need not stay awake until the wee hours of the night and awake deep in the mire of my laziness. i wrote this a few days ago... i've set an unholy blaze, it was fed by my hands and all my woes. it ran across my heart searing your love. searching

adm dmsnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8659422.post-1098946671082653512004-10-27T22:54:00.000-07:002004-10-27T23:57:51.083-07:00

hello...there. the sox won, 8 straight wins to victory. johnny damon is by far the coolest baseball player known to man, or beast. listenin to espn radio today my ears fell captive to the dan patrick show which hosted so many rad people... one of which was a collumnist for sports illustrated. he was talkin about the sox and brought up damons wierdness. one topic of conversation was pre game

adm dmsnoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8659422.post-1098856165124989532004-10-26T22:48:00.000-07:002004-10-26T22:49:25.123-07:00

http://www.chairandcouch.com/nostinkingway.mov this seems to be one of the coolest videos ive seen... i remember that night as if it were a crisp apple being torn by my hunger, the siegel father was gathering rage for hours. at the specific moment that you see his primal fury he was destroyed by his son, young joshua siegel. the previous hours of this night held his blood, and much of it at the

adm dmsnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8659422.post-1098742189459991612004-10-25T15:08:00.000-07:002004-10-25T23:23:55.933-07:00

today was quite an amazing day and in this day God showed His mighty arm of provision. today i was scheduled to go to a demo class at starbucks so i could learn how to sell $300 coffee machines to dumb customers. that was the plan as of 3 days ago but i now knew that i when i got to work at 12 it would be my former place of work. i went into the Lyons Den this morning to say hi to the owners, you

adm dmsnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8659422.post-1098692273415574632004-10-25T01:20:00.000-07:002004-10-25T01:17:53.416-07:00

Summer night skies bridge gaps between divine and inconsistent. We're both here, you in yours, me in mine. Apart. In these moments when stars find stillness we can speak. As close as I can come, as near as you will be. Almost cool enough to leave, but somehow your warmth finds me. Distractions glow beneath, your name is on my lips. Your voice could stop my heart so I lay belly up forgetting how

adm dmsnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8659422.post-1098600795323046512004-10-23T22:36:00.000-07:002004-10-23T23:53:15.323-07:00

ok so ive been thinkin about my favorite things lately (as one might do if they had things that brought them more joy than others) and i suppose i should and will share them with myself, since i am the only one to read this dumb thing. i guess the coolest categories are music , writing and all around coolness... Music Five Iron Frenzy (inspiring, fun)Blindside (ripping off your face, amazing)

adm dmsnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8659422.post-1098286467710529092004-10-20T08:29:00.000-07:002004-10-20T08:38:33.076-07:00

I was watching Hannity and Colmes last night and some old guy referred to John Kerry as trying to be both a dove and a hawk. I loved that analogy the second i heard it, i wrote it down immediately and later that night applied it to something we all need. its about grace and the ways we often view it. Dove or Hawk Splitting skies, the clouds awake. Light is found here, in this night before days

adm dmsnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8659422.post-1097809236735228972004-10-14T19:22:00.000-07:002004-10-14T20:00:36.736-07:00

Last night i saw endeavor play at the Graceland, it was one of the best performances they have given. i really enjoyed myself, it was a change of pace from the usual. that being go to the venue hours before the show to setup with the fellas then during the show take pictures or listen intently for flaws to talk about later. i didnt examine the music for what it was or what it wasnt, everything

adm dmsnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8659422.post-1097532236803197342004-10-11T14:41:00.000-07:002004-10-20T08:29:19.816-07:00

Wrote this last night...my frustration is mounting, i cant get out of this rut of rhyming...see! i also just heard a Postal Service song and i liked it. Speak to me in lack of words, sing me songs in distant chords, pluck thy harp with sudden stillness retreive my soul and father fill this. a life unlived im giving you, describe the path, the one i choose. ----- Abel’s Blood barely born, we

adm dmsnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8659422.post-1097398398704395732004-10-10T01:42:00.000-07:002004-10-10T02:00:50.236-07:00

A Place of Contentmentanother park bench, or the gazebo where the young couple is hiding love? a cane now presses against his leg, a sign of things to come. the lord smiles still, at this tweed jacket of a man. those channels still grip his face, a little deeper now, a little more time takes hold. never gray, this morning's filled with promise, tonight is cards with roger and the boys. still no

adm dmsnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8659422.post-1097396371816660692004-10-10T01:13:00.000-07:002004-10-14T19:21:39.970-07:00

So the other site i had sucked, this blog may suck too but in a lesser capacity and degree. i feel like i have gone from using AOL to an alternative internet provider such as Verizon DSL. i have indeed clicked on that little blue "e." I dont know exactly what compels me to write, but lately i havent been able to steer from the desire. When im not writing, im thinking about topics i havent

adm dmsnoreply@blogger.com0